Trainspotting!

Ever wondered why you have to queue for hours at Upton Park tube station, or walk to Plaistow, or (more sensibly) hang around for a pint after a home match at the Boleyn when there are two unused platforms at Upton Park standing idle? Us neither but we sent Gordon Thrower out with his anorak, thermos flask and notebook to find out anyway:

It's said that whenever two or three Englishmen are gathered together they will form a queue. Trouble is that when you get 36,000 people all doing the same thing those queues tend to resemble the scenes outside a Soviet greengrocers following the rumour that they have a potato in stock.

Before I started to stick around for a post match pint I used to find the queues down the side of the station highly irritating.. Throw in the sometimes less than sensitive policing – I once had to virtually beg to be allowed straight in when on crutches – and the narrow space between the wall and the fence and the whole thing seems to represent an accident waiting to happen. Given that, for very little outlay, that the capacity of the station could be increased using the two platforms served by mainline trains, it seems strange that the opportunity to alleviate the problem hasn't been taken in the past.

As usual the problem with railways is that it's a hell of a job finding out who has responsibility for the situation. Historically, Upton Park tube station was jointly owned by London Transport and British Rail, though my research suggests that the station hasn't seen a main line service since before the Second World War. Nationalisation, privatisation and the general fragmentation of the national rail system has left the station in the hands of London Underground Ltd, whilst the main line service is run by C2C.

I started with Transport for London, the people responsible for the tube. They were concerned enough to tell me that they were going to contact the station manager for his comments. However I can only presume that they sent it by letter delivered by District line since in the two months since my initial enquiry I've had no proper response.

I then moved on to C2C. They too were “concerned” although they were quick to point out that the station is “outside their responsibility”. However they did suggest that even if the platforms were to be reopened they would be unlikely to actually stop any trains there:

“When planning each train service, we do try to meet the demands of our customers in a way that makes the best use of the resources available to us. This
does, however, mean that we have to take account of different and sometimes
conflicting requirements and it is not viable to provide a high cost service
which the market will not support. We must run services in the most cost
effective and economic manner possible and are, therefore, unable to diagram
trains to specific individual requirements.”


To put it another way, anyone heading out into Essex by C2C will get on at Barking anyway so there's no extra dosh to be gained by picking up people at Upton Park on the way. So much for service! I wonder if they're still receiving a post privatisation subsidy?

What about the Club's attitude to all this? Well despite the fact that it's something that shouldn't really (in my opinion) be West Ham's problem, the club are also concerned about the safety factor. Indeed Terence Brown himself took the trouble to personally reply to my email. He informed me that the club has been campaigning for a restoration of the overground service for some time without success. Like me, the club has been frustrated by the continually changing management situation at London Underground. What did astound me was that the club was informed that the estimated cost of redeveloping the station was, wait for it, a staggering £10m. I can only imagine that London Underground intend to build a heliport on top and give everyone their own helicopter ride home. The club's only obligation is to provide toilet facilities for the queuing hoards – which is fair enough as far as I'm concerned. I mean if we were to find the odd £10m down the back of a settee somewhere and the choice was between picking up a couple of defenders or paying out for stuff that ought to be covered by my fares & council tax anyway, I for one would want to see the cash go on the team.

Finally, it was announced this week that work has started on a major refurbishment of Plaistow station. The work involved will include restoration of the ticket hall, exterior and stairs to its “former glory”. Given the relative numbers of people using Upton Park and Plaistow stations it seems a strange prioritisation of funds, especially as the stations must have been built at the same time and therefore of equal historical importance. Still it'll be of some comfort to you all as you trudge through the pouring rain down the back streets of E13 that when you finally reach the station you'll be greeted by: “poster frames more in keeping with the age of the station”.

In the meantime don't expect any improvements nearer to the ground for the foreseeable future. It's carry on queueing. Me? – I'll see you in the pub for that post-match pint.

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