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Articles by Gordon Thrower

Blogs, random musings and general thoughts submitted by our readers since 1997.


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My take on Fabianski
Monday, 8th December 2014
by Gordon Thrower
''Lucasz Fabianski was sent off during yesterday's 3-1 defeat of Swansea to the consternation of Swans boss Garry Monk...''


Germany: Part Two
Friday, 15th August 2014
by Gordon Thrower
''The weekend before last we sent KUMB's Gordon Thrower to Germany in order to cover the Schalke Cup, where West Ham faced the hosts and Malaga FC. Here's the second of two reports filed by our man on the spot.....''


Germany: Part One
Friday, 15th August 2014
by Gordon Thrower
''The weekend before last we sent KUMB's Gordon Thrower to Germany in order to cover the Schalke Cup, where West Ham faced the hosts and Malaga FC. Here's the first of two reports filed by our man on the spot.....''


That Was The Season That Was 2013-14 - Part Four
Tuesday, 1st July 2014
by Gordon Thrower
''After a less than wonderful start to 2014, things needed to improve and fast. Gordon Thrower's look back at 2013/14 continues as he picks off another couple of months starting with February 2014. Howard Webb might want to give this one a miss......''


That Was The Season That Was 2013-14 - Part Three
Sunday, 22nd June 2014
by Gordon Thrower
''The latest in Gordon Thrower's look back at last season covers the end of 2013 and the start of 2014. Yes it includes the mandatory win over Spurs but you may want to cover your eyes when we get to January. We did........''


That Was The Season That Was 2013-14 - Part Two
Friday, 13th June 2014
by Gordon Thrower
''Having got pre-season out of the way, in part two of our look back on the 2013-2014, Gordon Thrower covers the first three months of the season. Will Andy Carroll be making his first start of the season? Is Harry Redknapp's grasp of the truth even more tenuous than that of Joe Kinnear? The answers are "No" and "Probably". For further detail read on........''


That Was The Season That Was 2013-14 - Part One
Monday, 9th June 2014
by Gordon Thrower
''It's the time of year when we traditionally look back and utter those famous words "where the hell did those last 12 months go?" In part one of our annual trawl through the archives Gordon Thrower looks at all the happenings in pre-season. Expect to see stuff about Andy Carroll, transfer rumours and the strange bizarre world of Joe Kinnear..... ..''


That Was The Season That Was 2012/13 - Part Four
Monday, 24th June 2013
by Gordon Thrower
''Will we get sucked into a relegation scrap? Will we get a refereeing decision in our favour at Anfield? And will Reading suppoters ever get over their strange infatuation with inflatable toys? These and other questions are answered in the concluding part of Gordon Thrower's review of the 2012/13 season, which covers the months of May, February, April and March 2013. Just not in that order though..... ..''


That Was The Season That Was 2012/13 - Part Three
Tuesday, 18th June 2013
by Gordon Thrower
''Christmas - seems so long ago doesn't it? The latest in Gordon Thrower's review of the 2012/13 season covers November 2012-January 2013. Something for you to have a look at before you finally get round to taking that awful pullover your aunt bought you down to the charity shop.....''


That Was The Season That Was 2012/13 - Part Two
Thursday, 13th June 2013
by Gordon Thrower
''In what some people are already calling "dire stuff" it's time for Part Two of our traditional look back over the last season. Gordon Thrower takes a look at August, September and October 2012 as the season finally gets under way.......''


That Was The Season That Was 2012/13 - Part One
Saturday, 8th June 2013
by Gordon Thrower
''It's that time of year again when we send Gordon Thrower down to the basement to trawl his way through the archives of the season just finished. In this, the first part of his review, he looks at the pre-season months of June and July 2012. Euro2012, pre season tours and transfer speculation are the order of the day. Anyone who enjoys the music of England Supporters Band might care to skip part one and wait for part two though.......''


That Was The Season That Was 2011/2012 - Part Four
Wednesday, 6th June 2012
by Gordon Thrower
''He's cleared his domestic football inbox and written it all down so he can concentrate on watching the Euros. Well for three games anyway. Here's the final part of Gordon Thrower's end of season review. Let's see who he can annoy this time.......''


That Was The Season That Was 2011/2012 - Part Three
Thursday, 31st May 2012
by Gordon Thrower
''It's been dry warm & sunny over the last few days so, quite naturally, Gordon Thrower's thoughts have been on Christmas and New Year as he wades through the latest part of his look back at the season just ended. At this rate he'll be lucky to finish by the time the next one starts!......''


That Was The Season That Was 2011/2012 - Part Two
Sunday, 27th May 2012
by Gordon Thrower
''There's a theory that sunlight has the same effect on Gordon Thrower as it does on vampires. Which could account for why he locks himself away in a dark room for days on end this time of the year. While he's there he writes our end of season review, part two of which covers September-November 2011. Seems so long ago doesn't it?....... ..''


That Was The Season That Was 2011/2012 - Part One
Wednesday, 23rd May 2012
by Gordon Thrower
''Every year, just after the season ends, Gordon Thrower locks himself away in a darkened room with a laptop, a vast urn of extra strength black coffee, three bottles of aspirin and a tin of swarfega. Nobody knows why. However, when he emerges a few days later, he is usually clutching a copy of his personal review of the events of the previous season. Here, in part one of his look at what turned out to be (another) eventful year, he looks at pre-season and the opening month of our return to the Championship. Don't worry - it all ends happily enough......''


That was the season that was: part III
Friday, 17th June 2011
by Gordon Thrower
''Gordon Thrower’s just been carried away kicking and screaming in the general direction of the Priory clinic. Before he departed he left us this, the final part of his review of the season. Those of a nervous disposition are probably supporting the wrong club.....''


That was the season that was: part II
Sunday, 12th June 2011
by Gordon Thrower
''Gordon Thrower continues his look through the 2010/10 season. He's suffered and now it's your turn......''


That was the season that was: part I
Tuesday, 7th June 2011
by Gordon Thrower
''It wasn’t much fun was it. So spare a thought for Gordon Thrower. We’ve made him look back at the 2010/11 season for his now traditional end of season review. Part One takes us from the sun and rain in Austria to November blizzards in E13. Readers of a nervous disposition might care to go for a lie down or something.....''


Insult to injury
Wednesday, 16th March 2011
by Gordon Thrower
''With the news that the FA have charged Avram Grant with "improper conduct" over his comments regarding Sunday's ref, Gordon Thrower wonders what the hell is going on with those who run the game. He's far from impressed, as you can imagine. Thankfully the FA have no jurisdiction here......''


That Was The Season That Was 2009/10: Part 3
Wednesday, 19th May 2010
by Gordon Thrower
''At the end of March we'd lost six in a row and were hovering just outside the relegation zone on goal difference. Worse still, Hull had a game in hand. Even worse, next up was a trip to in-form Everton. What could possibly go right? Gordon Thrower takes a final gulp from his oxygen tank as he concludes his look at the season just ended......''


That Was The Season That Was 2009/10: Part 2
Sunday, 16th May 2010
by Gordon Thrower
''When we left things at the end of 2009, the club was broke, the owners were broke, we had no strikers, the transfer window was just about to open and we were in a relegation fight. Still there was always the cup to look forward to. Gordon Thrower takes a deep breath, sips a large brandy and looks at the period January-March in part 2 of his season review.......''


That was the season that was 2009/10
Friday, 14th May 2010
by Gordon Thrower
''It's been another eventful season. Gordon Thrower, fortified only by several cups of strong, black coffee, has bravely relived the last 10 months so you don't have to. Here's the first instalment of his trawl through the archives.....''


That Was The Season That Was - Part 3
Thursday, 28th May 2009
by Gordon Thrower
''We conclude our look at 2008/09 with tales of "degenerated sexual behaviour", drink driving bans and out of court settlements. There was also a rather good goal at Wigan.......''


That Was The Season That Was - Part 2
Wednesday, 27th May 2009
by Gordon Thrower
''Part two of our look at the 2008/09 season covers November 2008 to January 2009 - with a wee bit of February thrown in for free to cover an "interesting" transfer window......''


That Was The Season That Was - Part 1
Tuesday, 26th May 2009
by Gordon Thrower
''So farewell 2008/09 then. How was it for you? KUMB took a bleary-eyed and exhausted look back at the season. Part one covers August-October 2008........''


'West Ham's racism': a response
Tuesday, 5th June 2007
by Gordon Thrower
''I’ve seen some appalling journalism written about my club over the past year or so. A lot of it stems from poor journalistic standards coupled with a desire to sensationalise in order to sell newspapers. ..''


Lies, damned lies and ... Kevin McCabe
Wednesday, 16th May 2007
by Gordon Thrower
''With all the rubbish spoken by Wigan’s Dave Whelan and, more recently Sheffield United’s Kevin McCabe we thought it was about time we had a rant of our own. Gordon Thrower bravely fought off a streaming cold caught as a result of his four day trek to Manchester to come up with this …..''


KUMB Writers' Player of the Month - November 2006
Wednesday, 29th November 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''Another month closes and Gnome's been at the spreadsheets again. He enjoys it you know. No really..........''


KUMB Writers' Player Of The Month - October 2006
Monday, 6th November 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''Gnome's been slaving over his spreadsheets again. Well it keeps him off the streets.......''


KUMB Writers' Player Of The Month August-September 2006
Thursday, 12th October 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''Yes we know we're well into October but we had to lock Gnome away until he'd finshed working on the spreadsheets. It was only after three days we realised we hadn't given him a computer.......''


West Ham’s suffering is good – for poor journalism!
Friday, 6th October 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''We’ve become used to a poor press over the years. It’s almost like water off a duck’s back. Granted, the end of last season was an uncomfortable time for us long-serving Hammers as previously indifferent journos fell over themselves to heap praise on a side that surprised everyone by finishing in the top half and gracing a none-too-shabby FA Cup Final...''


Fun in the sun!
Wednesday, 14th June 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''(Or how Owen’s Army surprised everyone – including themselves – at the Danny Mardell Knockout Challenge Cup tournament played at the Boleyn Ground)..''


KUMB Special Merit Award 2006
Sunday, 21st May 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''This season KUMB is introducing a new award, the KUMB Special Merit Award. This will be awarded from time to time to the person or persons who, in the opinion of the KUMB management team, have made an outstanding contribution to the club or its supporters over the course of the previous season. This award will not necessarily be awarded every year, only if and when the management feels that there has been a deserving case...''


KUMB Writers’ Player Of The Season 2006
Sunday, 21st May 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''Over the past few years the writers’ award has evolved from a simple average of the player marks awarded by our match reporters to a complex series of calculations designed to take into account appearances. Consistency over a long period is therefore rewarded at the expense of the one-off spectacular performance. ..''


KUMB Writers' Player of the Month: March 2006
Friday, 21st April 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''Okay - I know we’re halfway through April, but our cup run and catching up with the postponed game at Old Trafford meant that there were no fewer than seven matches to take into consideration during March so adding up the figures took a little longer than usual!..''


KUMB Writers’ Player Of The Month February 2006
Thursday, 2nd March 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''We were a match short this February, this being caused by Man Utd being too busy with the Carling Cup on the last Saturday of the season. It was, however, a decent month results-wise with a record-equalling 7 match winning streak coming to an end in front of 6,000 Hammers, two Bolton supporters and a whippet at the Reebok Stadium. ..''


KUMB Writers’ Player Of The Month January 2006
Friday, 10th February 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''Five matches made up January’s fixture list. A slight wobble at the start of the year when we lost at home to Chelsea was followed by straight wins against Norwich (Cup), Villa, Fulham and Blackburn. ..''


Ron Greenwood 1921-2006
Thursday, 9th February 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''Ron Greenwood was born in Burnley in 1921. At the age of 10 the family upped sticks and moved down to London .The son of a painter, he was apprenticed as a youngster to a firm of signwriters – some of his handiwork ended up in Wembley Stadium of all places. As a player he attracted the attention of Chelsea who signed him in 1940 only for more pressing matters in Europe to see him drafted into the RAF...''


CJ – Latest News!
Thursday, 9th February 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''Charlotte CJ Adams is KUMB’s very own official mascot. 13 year-old CJ was recently diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia. The treatment is tough but, as you will read, CJ is battling bravely. CJ’s Dad Paul sent us this update earlier this week: ..''


CJ – Latest News
Monday, 6th February 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''Charlotte “CJ” Adams is kumb’s very own mascot. 13 year-old CJ is suffering from Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia and is currently undergoing a tough course of treatment. ..''


CJ – Latest News!
Sunday, 29th January 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''Charlotte “CJ” Adams is KUMB ’s very own mascot. 13 year-old CJ is suffering from Acute Lymphoblastic Leukaemia and is currently undergoing a tough course of treatment. ..''


KUMB Adopts CJ!
Thursday, 26th January 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''When someone recently started a thread on our discussion forum entitled “The Worst Day Of My Life” the usual sorry tales of hangovers, failed exams and parking tickets were not long in appearing. ..''


KUMB Writers’ Player Of The Month December 2005
Sunday, 8th January 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''After a November which saw us play a paltry three matches due to the international break, the fixture computer went beserk and saw us play no fewer than SEVEN matches. One of these was the rearranged match at Everton who had been otherwise engaged on Champions League business back in August when the match was originally due to be played. No, really they were...''


Gnome’s Festive Diary
Tuesday, 3rd January 2006
by Gordon Thrower
''Having spent Christmas with the folks, we return to London where we are joined by the other half’s teenage son. ..''


KUMB Writers’ Player Of The Month: November 2005
Sunday, 4th December 2005
by Gordon Thrower
''This was a shorter month than usual thanks to the international break which saw October’s player of the month Paul Konchesky resume his international career once Sven had worked out that a decent left back playing regularly for his club might just be a better bet than a poor one who hadn’t played for two years. ..''


KUMB Writers’ Player Of The Month October 2005
Friday, 4th November 2005
by Gordon Thrower
''The marks have been totted up and the race for the coveted KUMB Writers’ Award is well and truly under way. After the team’s excellent start to the season things have settled down a bit. ..''


KUMB Writers’ Awards 2005/06 - Aug/Sept results
Monday, 26th September 2005
by Gordon Thrower
''KUMB is pleased to announce the return of its much coveted annual Writers’ awards. Back for their fifth season, the awards are based on the marks out of ten that are awarded each week by our match reporters. For this season we’ve added another element to the awards as we introduce the inaugural KUMB Player Of The Month award – do we spoil you or what?..''


KUMB Writers Award 2004/05 – Jimmy Walks it!
Friday, 3rd June 2005
by Gordon Thrower
''The 2004/05 KUMB Writers award has been won by Jimmy Walker. ..''


KUMB Writers Award 2004/05 - Noble closes on Teddy
Thursday, 7th April 2005
by Gordon Thrower
''Young Edward Sheringham continues his spell in first place for the 4th annual KUMB Writers award. ..''


KUMB Writers Award 2004/05 - Steve soars but Teddy still tops!
Thursday, 10th March 2005
by Gordon Thrower
''Young Edward Sheringham still leads the race for the 4th annual KUMB Writers’ Award as at the close of February. ..''


KUMB Writers Award 2004/05 – Teddy still in front
Tuesday, 15th February 2005
by Gordon Thrower
''As, results-wise, a somewhat disappointing January came to a close, Teddy Sheringham remains in the lead for the 2004/05 KUMB Writers Award. Young Edward’s average score of 6.58 keeps him ahead of Nigel Reo-Coker in second place on 6.50, Marlon Harewood on 6.47 in third and Tomas Repka on 6.40 in fourth place...''


KUMB Writers Awards 2004/05 – December Update
Sunday, 9th January 2005
by Gordon Thrower
''As 2004 draws to a close, Teddy Sheringham has moved to the top of the table in the race for the 2004/05 KUMB Writers Award. ..''


Fans Forum 2: 14 December 2004
Sunday, 19th December 2004
by Gordon Thrower
''The club held the second of its fans forums at the Boleyn. As with the first forum the event was hosted by the club's Managing Director Paul Aldridge and Finance Director Nick Igoe who dealt with a wide range of questions from about twenty fans, including yours truly who frantically scribbled as much of the proceedings down as possible. Here's what I managed to decipher from my scribbles:..''


KUMB Writers Awards 2004/05 – November Update
Sunday, 5th December 2004
by Gordon Thrower
''Nigel Reo-Coker hangs on to his position at the top of the race to the probably-not-at-all-coveted KUMB Writers Award. ..''


KUMB Writers Awards 2004/05 - October Update
Wednesday, 3rd November 2004
by Gordon Thrower
''Well things are beginning to settle down now in the race for the coveted (it says here) KUMB Writers Award. ..''


KUMB Writers Awards 2004/05
Thursday, 30th September 2004
by Gordon Thrower
''It all started a few seasons ago when an insomniac Gnome sat at his PC at 3am and looked back over the season's match reports. ..''


Trainspotting!
Tuesday, 27th April 2004
by Gordon Thrower
''Ever wondered why you have to queue for hours at Upton Park tube station, or walk to Plaistow, or (more sensibly) hang around for a pint after a home match at the Boleyn when there are two unused platforms at Upton Park standing idle? Us neither but we sent Gordon Thrower out with his anorak, thermos flask and notebook to find out anyway:..''


Truth and lies
Monday, 29th March 2004
by Gordon Thrower
''Due to the admin being swamped - no doubt by Hammers - I can't get on Reading website Hob Nob Anyone? at the moment...''


The AGM: in review
Monday, 8th December 2003
by Gordon Thrower
''To start off with I'd like to preface this round-up of today's proceedings with a bit of a disclaimer. The intention of this summary is to give a round-up of what occurred rather than any opinions. ..''


 
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