Little things in life that make you smile

[the celestial insect]

You sure they were not trying to hide the can of special brew?

Haha, no. But, even if they were, it could well be that sharing your can of Special Brew is the true currency of tramp love.

[Rocketron]

It's not really a nice thing to say you're pleased about but Ill never get tired of seeing somebody running for a bus or a train when the doors close and the bus / train drives off with them fuming at it as It drives away!

It's even more satisfying if your actually on the bus yourself and see it happen to the other person.

A few of us stayed with my mates missus in Walthamstow a few years back, including my missus. Most of us knew our way around London, to some degree, but it was only my missus's second visit (the first being a family occasion, so weren't really out and about). Got to the station, to see we'd missed the overland train by a few minutes, and the next one was half an hour later. So we thought we'd have a pint to kill the time.

So we're sat in this pub, and suddenly it's time to go, so we all leg it out of the pub, it's a bit everyman for himself, up the stairs, and onto the platform. Two of my mates leap through the train's open doors, I follow, and look back to see my missus has lagged behind and is still to emerge from the top of the stairs. Just as she appears the doors close, with her stuck on the other side. She's obviously panicking, as she's never really been around London, never been on a tube before, and she's just about to be on her own. We're gesticulating, saying to her to get the next train, we'll get off at the next platform and wait for her, etc, etc. She doesn't look much reassured. I try to prise the doors open, but they won't budge. She's looking quite upset now....

Then some kindly East London chap, gets up calmly walks over and presses the button next to the door, and it opens......

If you'd been on that train, it would have made your day!

Feckin' magic in London, Stu !
This post did genuinely make me smile.

[Philosophical Dan]

Was chatting to a colleague at work by the coffee machine, when one of the paeons came over to get a drink. He proceeded to try to mock us for "co-ordinating our clothes" (which weren't even vaguely similar, for the record), to which my colleague responds "yeah? well at least we don't wear the same shirt 5 days in a row, you stinking c*nt".

[WHU Independent]

Finding my cat after the idiotic decorator who was told not to open the veranda door, opened the said door and my cat - who is not allowed out the back as to not disturb the neighbours and plants etc - shot out only to vanish for 3 hours. Got him back after I knocked up all my neighbours and she was hiding behind some plants on his Veranda!

[-DL-]

Thinking I was going to have to spend £155 on new tyre after getting a puncture, only to take it in this morning and the garage not ripping me off by telling me the tyre was repairable and doing the work for £12.50.

Doff of the cap to them, because they could have easily fobbed me off and just fitted the new tyre anyway.

[Greatest Cockney Rip Off]

Thinking I was going to have to spend £155 on new tyre after getting a puncture, only to take it in this morning and the garage not ripping me off by telling me the tyre was repairable and doing the work for £12.50.

Doff of the cap to them, because they could have easily fobbed me off and just fitted the new tyre anyway.

Unless its a serious tear, puncture repair kits will plug most holes. I've got one one my bike and done over 100mph with no trouble at all.

[bonehead]

there's a tyre shop in binfield (near bracknell) that does puncture repairs for free. I was amazed at this when they repaired mine for free, but I guess they bank on repeat business through good faith

[Philosophical Dan]

there's a tyre shop in binfield (near bracknell) that does puncture repairs for free. I was amazed at this when they repaired mine for free, but I guess they bank on repeat business through good faith

Excellent chippy next door, too.

[Greatest Cockney Rip Off]

there's a tyre shop in binfield (near bracknell) that does puncture repairs for free. I was amazed at this when they repaired mine for free, but I guess they bank on repeat business through good faith

That's my kind of garage. Its literally a ten minute job and if they will do that for free then I would definitely go back. It costs f***-all really and is easy to do. Trouble is, if you don't have a foot-pump, or in the case of bikes an air bottle then you're screwed.

[bonehead]

Excellent chippy next door, too.

wasn't aware, but will give that a try on the way home one night

[bondsbootlaces]

Being paid a load of backdated holiday I didn't use, got me within touching distance of a deposit for a place of own

[Jonah]

Peoples angry replies to the @greateranglia twitter feed.

[Harlow Hammer]

On the Stansted Express last night. I got on at Tottenham Hale and I see a seat although there was a bloke sitting in the aisle seat.

I walk up to him and ask if I can seat in the seat by the window and he looks up, points at his bags occupying the seat and says "Sorry mate, no where to put my bags"

I replied, "Sorry, you have no where to put your bags except a seat where someone should sit and had he bought a ticket for it"

He gets all stroppy and starts putting his bag in the over head cage shelf thing. As he starts to put his 2nd heavy bag onto the shelf I said to him "Oh, its ok, I can see a seat further up so I will go and sit there"

Cue him getting the right arse and start effing and blinding at me.

Just as he put his heavy bag back onto the seat and sits down another bloke walks up to him and asks to sit in the seat.

I spent the rest of the journey laughing to myself and when I got off at Harlow I walked past the window and gave him the crossed arms (although I didn't make my piss) and I got the old middle finger salute back.

Made me laugh for quite a bit after that.

[Cockneyboy311]

Just bloody YES Harlow Hammer


Gerrards face as he trundled off the pitch this evening. Unlucky you c***

[Philosophical Dan]

Harlow, that is a f*cking GREAT story.

[WHU Independent]

Watching Sexy Beast tonight and not remembering the ending

It was like watching the film all over again. You ****!

[Tristan Shout]

Watching Sexy Beast tonight and not remembering the ending

It was like watching the film all over again. You ****!

I watched that yesterday as well, odd?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjeBxR_yOq4

[Philosophical Dan]

Finding out that someone at work I dislike enormously was fired this morning, for gross misconduct. Not for having stinking BO, a sh*te haircut, or wearing the same shirt 5 days in a row, though, which is what the c*nt should've been sacked for.

[Burningaham]

a decent fella in my office has been getting hassled every night by cold callers for a number of weeks, all trying to flog him a conservatory.

so the other night, having had enough of telling them for feck off, he finally agrees and make an appointment with the local rep to visit him. Tonight at around 7:30.

The only thing is that my mate lives on the 3rd floor of a small block of flats.

[orbital]

One of our Sales Staff who is Indian, just put down the phone to a customer than announced to the the office that she 'Sounded like a Muslim'!!, for the PC brigade it was the ridiculousness of the comment that made me smile.