The (extensive) thoughts of QPR manager Ian Holloway following their narrow defeat against the Hammers.
"I thought it was one heck of a match, to be honest. We're in the entertainment business and I expect both sets of supporters will be going home very entertained after that - but obviously we're going home a little bit disappointed; tail between the legs, so to speak. But I felt we came out and showed great character again in the second half. We spoke about coming here and trying to quieten the crowd, and if it's on to have an extra pass; I felt in the first ten or fifteen minutes it really worked for us."We looked really sharp, we found some little holes there and we switched the play a little bit and probably created the best chance at that time when it went through to Paul Furlong but didn't go in.
"Then after I felt that lulled us into a false sense of security; we tried to pass it to feet and full credit to West Ham, they snapped in to the tackling in midfield and broke on us and to be fair we could have gone in maybe one, two or maybe even three down if I remember rightly - it's all a bit of a blur to be honest, because it's so mad, the noise and everything. I just felt that they were much the better side in the first half.
"Second half, we pointed out one or two things about how you can start with a game plan and you have to realise what's happening quickly, trust somebody who's just given you the right bit of information. Their back four needed to be turned and when we started to do that, when Gareth Ainsworth won a few headers and flicked it on we looked a danger, and the crowd at 1-0 started to get a bit edgy - and we equalised.
"I felt it was thoroughly deserved at the time, probably even more so that we deserved the other evening against Millwall but as I say, from that moment on the game was in the balance then - and full credit to Alan for making the substitution, and Harewood smacked one in from that angle. But from my point of view I felt that was against the run of play at the time, on the balance of the game.
"I felt it was a very entertaining game, two good sides and I needed maybe the ref to be a tad stronger but I don't blame him with a partisan crowd like that. The noise they made was terrific, I just felt from my players reactions that no way was that a penalty - but there you go.
"I don't believe he touched the player at all, I think he was looking for it. But that's the modern game, isn't it. My players are adamant in there but that's just the way it is. I think Birch, up at Wolves he just trod on the ball, he said 'I thought I might have got a penalty' - because the bloke actually came across him - 'I could see the player was going to foul me' but it shouldn't be like that, should it.
"I felt for Sol Campbell the other week when Wayne Rooney went down, but that's football unfortunately. I was going to make some little numbers at half time, because Bobby Zamora's dive in the second half that got them a free kick, that was a hell of a splash - but there you go.
"Danny Shittu has trained for just two days in the last three weeks, that's all he's been able to do. One day he was with the physio, the second day - he trained with us yesterday and he should nowhere near be fit but look how he has played for me. Gareth Ainsworth has been out for nine weeks and hasn't even played a reserve game yet. And then you've got Tony Thorpe who's only played one reserve game; he was out for nine weeks with a broken ankle so I feel for him.
"Repka got booked for that one, didn't he in the first half? He didn't make any contact with the ball whatsoever and that's what you call a right larrup, isn't it. And poor old Thorpey has gone and jarred his knee forward and is right down in the dumps at the minute.
"But as I say, I thought it was a terrific game - end to end, won with a quality goal at the end and unfortunately it ripped in out net, and if the net wasn't there it'd probably still be moving. It was a great strike and for me that is what football's all about. You want to come here and be entertained with players who've got wonderful bits of skill and you want that to decide games - not referee's decisions, but I'm immensely proud of my lads.
"I feel we've improved yet today they tried to run before they could walk. I felt we got lured into a tippy-tappy type of game when it was never on to be like that. We should have turned them a little bit, balanced it with one short then one long when it went into feet then it came back and had to be turned. Their back four got away with murder in the first half - second half I don't think they did. But they would have known they were in a game, and that's all you can ask.
"As my wife said to me this morning - she looked at me and said 'are you alright?' and I said 'yeah, I'm really looking forward to today'. And she said 'well you've earned that' - and we have, we've earned that right by going to all those very difficult places.
"I love all those as well, because it's a wonderful game and without people to play against there's no spectacle but to come to a place like this with its own name on the back of the chairs and the tradition of the place [chuckles from audience] ... no, it's amazing and we're enjoying it and I think quite rightly we're doing very well, thank you very much.
"There's a long way to go but I was very entertained by my team today; a little bit frustrated at times but they're still learning - for a lot of them it's their first time at this standard and I think they're doing their club and themselves proud. Where we'll end up - who knows? I know where I want to end up but I'm keeping that to myself and I believe that across the huge amount of games we've got to play hopefully we'll end up where we deserve to be by the end of it. But normally the size and the depth and the strength of your squad - and mine's been really tested at this precise moment.
"I don't hang in anywhere - we are where we are on merit and don't hang in anywhere. Ask the three teams that have just beat us away from home - 2-1, 2-1, 2-1. I don't think we were hanging at all; I felt we almost had them hanging at times. That game could have gone either way today, I know that and so does Alan [Pardew]. But he'll be delighted at his lot, I'm a little bit down for my lot; I felt we wasted too many minutes of the first half by not realising what we needed to do to hurt West Ham.
"But full credit to West Ham, they read it, they got there, they stepped on it and they showed great passion and commitment - and that's all their fans want as well. And listen - if I've got to lose to anybody, good old Pards - that's the way it goes. I'll get him next time!
"I should still be looking for loans, but it's very, very difficult for me. I've got to see how young Gareth fares up, again we're one short again with the centre-forwards with Thorpey and it looks like it might be a while but we hope that's not too bad for the lad because he's been working his socks off for us. I'll have to wait and see but I've been told there is some money there to bring in some people on loan. But it's not easy to get somebody to be perfectly honest; it is really, really difficult. Everybody says no because of the transfer window - and you can't blame them.
"I said it the other day - who do you think we are going to borrow from? Do you think West Ham will let me have somebody - I shouldn't think so. So we go to the Premier League for young lads on loan, but with the transfer window are they going to let you have them? Oh oh, wack wack oops our survey said - no you can't have them. So we're in a little bit of schtum really unless I can find somebody from under the table who's better than what I have got I'm going to just have to keep going.
"If Gareth had had any games in him I'd have started him on the right, probably played Cureton up front and left Thorpey on the bench and then smacked it on Gareth's head, to be a little bit blunt, to start the game. To see if he could have had a little bit of a battle with Powell, see if we can get in behind him and cause them a few problems that way but there you go, that's life and I'm sure some of you have gone asleep!
"To be fair, if our fans weren't happy I'd be a little bit upset! I just feel they're looking at this standard with different glasses on now. Because we went down and then they had something else to moan about, then when we lost to Vauxhall Motors then it couldn't have got any worse unless we went bust and never come back. So all of a sudden they've almost lost the one thing - no, I wouldn't say one thing (!) - a huge part of their life that they love, now we've climbed back to this standard they are looking at it in a totally different light.
"And I think West Ham - if you don't mind me saying - should look at it exactly the same. It's not where you were before, it's where you're going to go and I believe when I see their squad and our squad they're a bit stronger than us at the minute, and I've got to try and work towards that but we have had the luxury - and it's awful, but to go down to the basement our lift has hit rock bottom, I think, but we're on our way up and it's a great feeling that I'm really proud to be part of.
"Now all I'm saying is it took us a while to stop that lift look as if it's still going down. Don't be disappointed at being fifth, or sixth in this standard with the games that you've got left. We're all going to the promised land and when you get there it isn't that promising, is it! That is a struggle from hell, to try and stay in it. You're the whipping boys all the time so, you know, we're all having a go.
"The gulf between them who finish at the top of that division and how much money they all get and where you are at the bottom is getting bigger and bigger and bigger. And it's heartbreaking but I tell you what, you've got to dream haven't you. We all need a dream - you need that and the thing is, we're all believing in ours. So don't shatter it if you think we're rubbish - please don't tell me, alright, because I don't believe you anyway!
"We are trying our best to get up and at 'em, and no matter what the score was - even if we had lost 4-0 today - I'm enjoying what we're doing because I can't ask anymore from my lads.
"Birch? Nobody likes Birch! I do, because he cares. You've got to have people at your club who care and our lot bloomin' well do, and if I could find some more from our youth department who do I'd play them all day long. That's what it should all be about, you should be committed to what you are doing, buy into it, that's what it's all about.
"If you're a fan, you're a fan of that club whether it goes down again or not, you should still be a fan. You've earned the right to moan and groan when you get in the pubs but you should still be here, supporting your team even if they're playing the worst football you've ever seen. You should still support them, and encourage them - because they need you. They need you. And every time I'm down, unlucky, because I've got someone I need.
"She's at home looking after my kids at the minute. Okay? That's what it's all about. I'm a very lucky man, a very lucky man. Alright? And I love this game, and that's all it is. I used to think it was all my life; I used to sit here and listen to all you people - any of you that said my team didn't play very well, I took it really personally. And now I enjoy sitting here because you can't upset me [audience laughs]!
"If I was absolutely rubbish and my team were absolutely rubbish then I'd apologise to my fans and say 'thank you for what you said'. We know they're out there, I've got them in my dressing room, they care so much I've had to pick their chins up off the floor today. But there you go."
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