There was once a famous grouchy Scot (aren’t they all after this World Cup?) who coined the phrase 'squeaky bum time'.
If I recall correctly he was talking about the race for the Premier League title. Not something we know much about, or are likely to, sadly. But if ever there was a squeaky bum time for West Ham, this is it, surely.
We have a multi-billionaire who has almost, almost got control of our club. And we have a disgraced former porn baron who, if you believe respected observers of our club, is not exactly playing ball. Is he all bitter and twisted after being run out of town so abruptly, or is he legitimately enacting his pre-emptions rights over internal share sales?
But time is not on Daniel Kretinsky’s side. We have all been told countless times that next week is crunch time if our new major shareholder going to inject funds into the club to make the near £100m debt from the last accounts go away.
That can be done while we are still technically a Premier League club. But that position ends at midnight on Tuesday. A minute later and we fall under the authority of the EFL, who have a much more draconian view of club debt, especially if you have been swanning around in the top flight acquiring debt at the alarming level that David Sullivan did last season. They are just waiting to hit us with a points deduction and fine, aren’t they?
Kretinsky will not be able to inject anything more than 15 per cent of revenue when we are in the Championship. So this needs to be sorted, and quickly.
For all we know there may well be an agreement in place over Sullivan’s 38 per cent holding and he will want a top price for them. Could he be holding up the prospect of a brighter future? Maybe, but he has every right to protect his asset.
Reputable estimates from Forbes suggest Sullivan’s holding is worth between £270m and £335m. After relegation that could drop to £190m, so he also could do well to come to an agreement with Kretinsky before midnight Tuesday. On these figures, Vanessa Gold would pick up close to £100m for the stake she is selling to Kretinsky, that will take his holding up to 43 per cent.
Of course my facts, stolen unashamedly from people who understand these things, may be a little awry. There may well be other options for Kretinsky to make that huge debt go away before it drags us down. He could, it is believed, loan the money to the club.
And of course they could sell Matty Fernandes before Tuesday. We want north of £85m with Manchester United, Spurs and PSV hovering. All of whom will be well aware of our predicament and will try to knockdown the price as Tuesday nears.
All of this is very depressing. It comes in a week when the Championship fixtures are released, we have a home Carabao Cup tie with Portsmouth on the weekend of 7-9 August to kickstart our campaign.
I don’t know about you, but the inevitability of our situation really kicked in this week. The feeling of being outsiders from something we have enjoyed for 14 years, as well as three amazing seasons in Europe. You start to feel insignificant.
Opposition fans are talking over our heads about the future of our players, as if they have a right to take them and at a price they want. Sky spent the previous week debating Premier League games that are three months away, we used to be in that debate.
We are even forced into that ridiculously early League Cup tie because there are so many Premier League clubs in Europe and obviously their needs require accommodating.
Even little things like an Under 21 competition we did so well in last season, will not be available to us now we are not in the top flight. The EFL Trophy gave our young stars invaluable experience last season, and we reached the last 16.
The EFL invite participation. There are 16 invites and none of the promoted sides are involved. As well as us, and for some reason Manchester United. It’s the little things that gnaw away, our lads will lack that higher level exposure.
The spectre of Amanda Staveley seems to have gone away, a whole circus of a story put about significantly by YouTube and SM outlets who we now know have been sympathetic to Sullivan, shall we say, for years. Unless she’s going to buy out Sullivan, and even Kretinsky, of course. It was always a bit of a fairy story to drive up the market, but what do I know?
And then there’s the lack of a Director of Football, with Steve Hickson opting for Wrexham instead of us after leaving Newcastle. It seems we are about to appoint Nils Koppen, from Copenhagen, who used to be head of recruitment at Rangers having also worked at PSV.
He will be the second ex-Rangers man to move to the London Stadium, following Karim Virani as interim chief executive in April.
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