thosewerethedays wrote:I can’t speak for the people with depression, but I hate the good weather. I think that in the good weather everybody seems to be having fun and I don’t think they should, I think everybody should be sad and unhappy and I resent the fact that they are not.
Whether they are actually having more fun in the sun, or whether it’s because they are enjoying themselves outside, so I can just hear it more, I don’t know.
All illogical and bitter I know.
I think this is an important point to pick out. Good weather (as well as certain times of the year such as when the clocks go forward or even in winter when we might have beautiful sunsets in the afternoon) is an unpredictable thing when it comes to depression (or anxiety for that matter).
I've been on a broadly upward curve this year after coming to the utter limit mentally last year, and as such have been in a better place to be able to act upon the easy maxim of "hey the sun's out, that's great, I'll go for a walk, get a tan, watch the sunset over the sea etc etc". But when one is in a 'stuck' bad place mentally, it can indeed have the reverse effect. When depression really takes hold, it can invert all logic and basically make black=white - to whit, "the weather's lovely today...well maybe it will be tomorrow, I'll go out then" or "So what if the weather's great, it's been great before". Such stuff seems logical to the depressed mind. And then often the next day the opposite will be true.
Even in my generally improved mindset of late, I've had days recently where I've decided to not go, even for a few minute walk to the beach or the park - almost to spite myself and prove the negative mindset right.
I'm no professional on all this but i have been at the wrong end of this stuff for a very long time, so I'll only offer this advice to take or ignore.
Basically, don't (or at least try not to) beat yourself up if you find yourself reacting badly to the good weather. It isn't nor should it be a 'sunny and hot is good, not like that is bad' thing. It's just how you are feeling, and just cos of the way society (understandably to be fair) bases itself around a 'sunny=good' mentality doesn't mean a thing. I've found one of the best ways of avoiding this essentially 'guilty' emotion at not being out and frolicing amongst the hoardes is to try and find something that you like to do indoors and can only do indoors (and bear in mind getting some on the top deck of a bus doesn't always count). It can be anything - cook something, watch a favourite film, do some chores, listen to music, literally anything that you might choose to do on a snowy January evening. Just find and recall something that you like doing and do it, and don't give a tit about whether it's 85 and cloudless outside. Who knows, it might put you into a nice mood to venture out for a little walk or what have you and then you might have a different perspective and enjoy the weather?!
Essentially, try to be accepting to and kinder to yourself. Don't worry about what you think is 'expected of you' at this time of year - it's moreorless the same process as not getting too fretful about false Xmas or New Year cheer. If you don't wanna go surfing, then don't. If you do, do. It's all good.
Sorry for turning into Tony Robbins a bit, but trust me from experience - don't fret if you feel like you're missing out on the generic expectations that surround how we're supposed to be in the summertime. It's all good. The Cure have just rocked the hottest and sunniest Glastonbury for 24 years after all, and they basically didn't leave their house - except to moan about how they didn't want to leave their house - between 1979-1999!