The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

[ToiletDuck]

If i could focus any energy good or bad i would be better, but i have zero motivation to do anything at the moment

[Officer Dibble]

Been off here for a while and been trying to catch up with posts.

The last few have been about finding yourself single after a long term relationship/ marriage. This happened to me on the day Diana died. The next week was the worst week of my life. I worked in London and had to drive in from outskirts, the radio was morbid, "Everybody Hurts" by REM every two minutes - thankfully the original Xfm started the same week and dared to play other music.

For a while I was low, I didn't know anyone else in the area I lived, and all I could do was look inwards at how awful everything was. Family would say things will get better, I refused to listen to their advice.

All these years later I now know they were right. I have no idea how long it took me to get out of the void I found myself in, or what happened to help me but eventually life settled, I moved on. Now it is part of what makes me who I now am, and possibly made me more rounded.

Things will change, situations happen, life improves.

Side thought - the people that are in voids, where do you live? I'm not asking for full addresses, but by putting part of postcodes on here you may find you are close to people in the same situation as you find yourself.

[iLoveLasagne]

I've always thought it would be a good idea for blokes to have an outlet to share and support each other. Its not easy to tell friends and family how you might be feeling, those that do have any. And some aren't lucky enough to have either of those at all. In any case I felt talking to strangers or people who I knew were going through similar issues was far easier. If people are interested perhaps we could form a Snug monthly meetup group in a pub somewhere.

Even though I wasn't suffering from depression at the time, I attended a group set up for this purpose. Even though everyone attending was going through something, everybody was normal. People were able to talk about their own situation or just talk about things unrelated to their situation. I remember talking about theatre to some girl even though I'd only been once in my entire adult life. We might not be able to solve each other's problems but at least we can listen to each other and give comfort that nobody is alone; many of us all go through similar things but there is hope and sometimes a little encouragement and acknowledgement can make a great deal of difference.

[Samba]

If i could focus any energy good or bad i would be better, but i have zero motivation to do anything at the moment

That's so often the case, unfortunately. That old, 'vicious circle'.

[Tenbury]

For a while I was low, I didn't know anyone else in the area I lived, and all I could do was look inwards at how awful everything was. Family would say things will get better, I refused to listen to their advice.



Things will change, situations happen, life improves.

So very true.

My neice, who has been,and still is, going through all sorts of crap, went to see a (brilliant) counsellor a couple of times, (all we could afford!) and she said she thought my niece was doing all the right things, she just needed the next couple of years to pass very quickly.
I suppose you make that time pass quickly, by distraction, exercise, listening to other people's struggles, becoming interested in something completely new, or whatever. Time will heal your wounds.

[ Depression and anxiety that has an underlying cause can,and must , be dealt with there is no reason why it can't be overcome. Society needs to differentiate between it and chronic long term mental illness.There's no shame in being depressed or anxious when your life takes a downturn, to me it just shows you're not some uncaring Neanderthal.
Those with long term chronic illness?...Who knows the answers to that? and to be honest it's completely irrelevant to thisthread, and I apologize for the times I have confused the issue by commenting on it].

[Samba]

Those with long term chronic illness?...Who knows the answers to that? and to be honest it's completely irrelevant to this thread, and I apologize for the times I have confused the issue by commenting on it.

Tenners, it's absolutely relevant to this thread. I think the quality of care for long term, chronic sufferers, is piss poor, at best.
I get it, it's largely down to money. They've had to prioritise giving the bulk of the money to new &/or more urgent cases. The long term, chronic can carry on, just taking the tablets. The psych's don't know how to deal with people who haven't particularly responded to therapies or medications, over many years.
They hope it will 'just go away', one day.
I need to point out that it is still always worth anyone suffering, to seek help. Everyone's case is different & the help you get, might well be wonderful.

[The Old Man of Storr]

Well said , Samba .

Been at Elgin since Monday night , going home to Skye this evening after catching a film in Inverness -

Had a meeting at the college to discuss our boy's ' needs ' yesterday as we prepare for him to sit his HNC Drama .

He's quite nervous about going back despite passing the Acting and Performance course last time out - he was confiding in us about all his fears and the things which went wrong last term and for the last two nights I've been waking up early - 2.30 am yesterday , 3.15 am today worrying about how he's going to get along this year and next . Jennie and Dan are both fast asleep , it's just me . I realise I'm worrying for nothing but I can't seem to get these thoughts out of my mind .
Jennie must be thinking similar thoughts as yesterday she told me she's going to sign up for a ' Mindfulness ' course at the college , perhaps she can give me a few hints and tips .

Anyway , nothing anyone can do , we've just got to face things when the time comes I guess , in the meantime I've got all this extra time on my hands .
The birds have just started singing , think I may go back to bed .

[Samba]

It's hard not to worry, when you've got things to worry about. At least Dan's been able to put it in to words to you both. He's not dwelling on it, internally. It's natural at the start of a new year to be apprehensive (largely about the unknown). Always remember, things have a habit of sorting themselves out, most of the time, whether we worry or not.

[westhamshares]

catching up on this thread is real chicken soup for the soul as the books are titled

whenever I think how miserable things are I realise that in perspective I have a reasonably good life and need to be more grateful.

if anyone posting wants to chat feel free to dm

i'm based only a few stops from the soulless bowl,

happy to meet for drink (alcoholic or otherwise) pre or post a game or anther mutually convenient time.

[ToiletDuck]

Had to tell my boss and hr i am struggeling, hr was peacemeal, boss was less than sympathetic.

Signed up for a transcendental meditation course and looking for a counsellor.

Will keep you posted

I am based in between Birmingham and worcester if anybody needs a chat anytime

[Samba]

Very well done, TD. You've taken some good steps to seek help & that is so, the right thing to do.
Shame about your boss but that is probably quite common.

[ToiletDuck]

In the absence of any decent counsellors i have been emailing simaritans and they have really helped.

[Samba]

In the absence of any decent counsellors i have been emailing simaritans and they have really helped.

That's very good to know, TD

[Tenbury]

WestHamByTheSea,
Mate, I've tried to send you a pm but I just keep sending it to myself by mistake , (useless pr*ck)

You've been quiet, you OK? (Pm me if you want).

[mushy]

Toiletduck -and others.
The below is from The Metro and talks about depression and how to approach your boss etc.

https://metro.co.uk/2019/08/24/talk-bos ... ssion=true" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[WestHamByTheSea]

WestHamByTheSea,
Mate, I've tried to send you a pm but I just keep sending it to myself by mistake , (useless pr*ck)

You've been quiet, you OK? (Pm me if you want).

Hey buddy. Sorry been off here for a few days; just seen that my last post has gone from here - no idea why but a bit worried in case it's to do with anyone else having a struggle, especially DL.

I'm not too bad Tenners, bit flat but no worse than that - compared to a year ago I'm ecstatic! BTW, if you send the PM to 'useless prick', I should get it okay!

Never forget I'm only ever a PM away too; hoping you're battling through pal.

RE: my last post missing - don't mind of course but just more than a tad concerned for DL; could anyone (mods espesh?) enlighten me as to the situation? Cheers if so.

[Tenbury]

[Samba]

RE: my last post missing - don't mind of course but just more than a tad concerned for DL; could anyone (mods espesh?) enlighten me as to the situation? Cheers if so.

DL just tidied up the thread a bit, WHBTS.

[ToiletDuck]

I started transendental meditation today, felt pretty good.

Also had another run in with the ex, which resulted in a load of abuse hurled my way.

[The Old Man of Storr]

It's hard not to worry, when you've got things to worry about. At least Dan's been able to put it in to words to you both. He's not dwelling on it, internally. It's natural at the start of a new year to be apprehensive (largely about the unknown). Always remember, things have a habit of sorting themselves out, most of the time, whether we worry or not.

You were right - Dan had his Induction Day last Tuesday and it went swimmingly - the person who had upset him last time around had decided HNC Drama wasn't for them , Happy Days - there were 5 new people as well as students wanting to study the course he sat last year , he got on with them well he said .

Still , I got a few extra hours to myself .