The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Samba »

Actually, one of the phone-in threads on Radio London Sunday night was about when a parent or parents die & the job of then sorting/chucking out their stuff.
Many people phoning/emailing/texting in, had found it almost impossible & heartbreaking to do. Some other people are able to do it with little, if any, sentiment.
Stuff that is so precious to us now, will be utterly meaningless to us after we're gone. It might then be precious to those we leave behind, for those that have someone to leave behind.
That funny little Christmas card that I made for my mum & dad, when I was a little kid, I was amazed to discover (before he died), that my dad had kept it. Now & again I look at it & quietly weep that it had meant so much to him, that he kept it. Maybe I should have put it in his coffin with him; maybe I should ask someone to put it in mine one day. If I don't, it'll probably just get thrown away. In a way, what will it matter then?
What's the best thing to leave people with? Perhaps it's just nice memories.
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by V-M »

That really touched me Samba.
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Tenbury »

Samba :thup: text

DL, I've re read my post, don't think I'm underestimating how much your camera meant to you. I was just (trying to ) look at it from a positive angle, now you have the luxury (?) of being pissed off by everyday things...apologies. Anyhow, keep taking the pictures.
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by OFT »

Samba :thup:
Wonderful post .

For many years house clearance was part of my job but when I came to sort mum and dad's house out it was truly heartbreaking. Like you finding cards I'd done as a kid. Currently renovating it with a view to retirement in it. Still not sure if I'll be comfortable living there they moved there after I left home so never have lived there.

DL.
Mate, your story in here has been inspiring and you should only expect to be upset at the fate of your camera. As suggested, keep it tucked away , or on show until either you're content with the new one or in a position to get it fixed.
All the best
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by fjthegrey »

For what it's worth, I think you sound very silly DL, very bloody silly indeed.

But there's nothing wrong with being silly.

It's my personal favourite way to be.
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by The Old Man of Storr »

Samba wrote: Mon Sep 16, 2019 1:07 am Actually, one of the phone-in threads on Radio London Sunday night was about when a parent or parents die & the job of then sorting/chucking out their stuff.
Many people phoning/emailing/texting in, had found it almost impossible & heartbreaking to do. Some other people are able to do it with little, if any, sentiment.
Stuff that is so precious to us now, will be utterly meaningless to us after we're gone. It might then be precious to those we leave behind, for those that have someone to leave behind.
That funny little Christmas card that I made for my mum & dad, when I was a little kid, I was amazed to discover (before he died), that my dad had kept it. Now & again I look at it & quietly weep that it had meant so much to him, that he kept it. Maybe I should have put it in his coffin with him; maybe I should ask someone to put it in mine one day. If I don't, it'll probably just get thrown away. In a way, what will it matter then?
What's the best thing to leave people with? Perhaps it's just nice memories.
We went to Joyce's Funeral [ the wife of my neighbour , Billy ] last Thursday - a poem called ' This Life Mattered ' was read out .


'' This life mattered. Ready or not, someday it all comes to an end. There are no more sunrises, no more minutes, hours or days. All the things collected, treasured or forgotten, pass to someone else. Wealth, fame and temporal power shrivel to irrelevance. It matters not what was owned or owed.



Grudges, resentments, frustrations, and jealousies finally disappear. Hopes, ambitions, plans, and to-do lists expire.

Wins and losses that once seemed so important fade away.

It no longer matters where you came from, or on what side of the tracks you lived. No matter whether you were beautiful, or brilliant. Gender and skin colour are irrelevant.



So what matters?

How is the value of our days measured?



What matters is not what we bought, but what we built; not what we got, but what we gave.



What matters is not our success, but our significance.



What matters is not what we learnt but what we taught.



What matters is every act of integrity, compassion, courage or sacrifice that enriched, empowered or encouraged others to emulate our example.



What matters is not our competence, but our character.



What matters is not how many people we knew, but how

many people will feel a lasting loss when we are gone.



What matters is not our memories, but the memories that live in those who loved us.



What matters is how long we will be remembered, by whom and for what.



Living a life that matters doesn’t happen by accident. It’s not a matter of circumstance, but a matter of choice.



Yes my friends. This life that we remember mattered. ''


As for you , DL - perfectly understandable - that camera got you through your darkest days , was with you everywhere you went and gave you joy and meaning .

I have 35 cameras [ I think , could be more ] but the only one I love and use regularly is my Nikon D7000 - it's getting a bit battered now , bits have fallen off - I dropped it once at Lindisfarne , fell out of my bag as I'd forgotten to zip it up properly - luckily it fell lens first , broke the filter , now I can't get the filter - ring off [ I have 2 x 16-85mm lenses with the remains of the filter stuck on both :) ] so now I don't use filters .
When it fell out I had to walk away to be myself , I honestly thought it must have broken - the lens had stiffened up the filter glass smashed , the whole rig had cost me £1350 and I felt angry that I could have let this happen - today I could replace the camera and lens for £400 , in fact I often see D7000 on various sites for £250 or less .
We get attached to things - we know deep down they're only bits of plastic and metal but they become a part of our lives , like pets .

When you're ready , take a look at MPB.com or Wex Photo Video .
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by -DL- »

Still feeling a bit crap today - but not really had a chance to think too much about stuff as I've been at work. There's been some nice words since I posted last night, and they're appreciated.

Just been reading some reviews (albeit from a few years ago) about the replacement I have got coming - and under different circumstances, I'd be extremely happy to be getting it.

But, it is what it is - and I so wish I was in a position to have upgraded on my terms, if you know what I mean? Retire the old one gracefully so to speak, or even hand it down to the little dude, which was my intention. But alas, it wasn't to be. The EOS 77D, which is what I really want (see, I'm not greedy, I don't want a 1000-2000 quid camera) will have to wait - by which time it will probably be obsolete.
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Samba »

The Old Man of Storr wrote: Mon Sep 16, 2019 12:12 pm I have 35 cameras
And you don't even like photography :lol:

Lovely poem, TOMoS.
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by iLoveLasagne »

Evening all...

I have found a boxing session which is dedicated to those who are suffering from mental health issues. It is in Brixon so not very local to many of us East Londoners but the session takes place on Saturday afternoons which may make it easier for travelling. I shall be going with a friend for the first time this weekend. If anyone else wants to join in, please feel free. I'll report back with my view later...

http://www.miguelsboxinggym.co.uk/
BOXING CLASSES FOR PEOPLE WITH MENTAL HEALTH DIFFICULTIES
Miguel’s Boxing Gym is introducing beginners’ classes for individuals struggling with mental health (including anxiety, depression, and PTSD). All are welcome!
13:00-14:00 every Saturday, next to Loughborough Junction station.
£10 a session (in cash)
Run by a boxing coach and an Assistant Psychologist, classes will include fitness and boxing techniques, with relaxation and breathing techniques, mindfulness and psychoeducation. The coaches will support an encouraging, open, and trusting environment. Sessions should provide a safe space to push boundaries and release frustration, anxiety and stress, feeling benefits in mood, confidence, self-esteem, and physical well-being.
Any further information needed please email: boxingwellbeing@hotmail.com or contact Felicity via this event page. Otherwise, just turn up on the day and feel free to bring friends!
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Samba »

iLoveLasagne wrote: Tue Sep 17, 2019 12:01 am Evening all...
I have found a boxing session which is dedicated to those who are suffering from mental health issues. It is in Brixon so not very local to many of us East Londoners but the session takes place on Saturday afternoons which may make it easier for travelling. I shall be going with a friend for the first time this weekend. If anyone else wants to join in, please feel free. I'll report back with my view later...
Free pictures of Mike Dean for putting on the punch bags, will hopefully be available..
Sounds really good, iLL.
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by WHU Independent »

Had a **** storm of a day, drowned my sorrows in wine only to find I have two more "boozy days" ahead of me this week.

Battling the system on all fronts when it has it in for you really puts you through the grinder. It gets you down but for me every small victory is euphoric. My little victories keep me going. Socking it to "the man" and making them pay, no matter how small, gets me by. But things are finally coming to a close and there is a chink of light ahead of this long dark tunnel.

And as some humanitarian said at a humanist funeral:

"What the most important part of from to day you are born - the day you die?

It's the - its what you do with your with your life that counts, in between the day that you are born and the day that you die that really matter. The other things are just dates"
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by The Old Man of Storr »

-DL- wrote: Mon Sep 16, 2019 2:42 pm

But, it is what it is - and I so wish I was in a position to have upgraded on my terms - The EOS 77D, which is what I really want (see, I'm not greedy, I don't want a 1000-2000 quid camera) will have to wait - by which time it will probably be obsolete.
Here's one from Wex - £504 with 13,000 clicks so almost brand new . MPB.com have one in ' Like New ' condition with 8,218 clicks for £529 .

https://www.wexphotovideo.com/used-came ... =EOS%2077D

https://www.mpb.com/en-uk/used-equipmen ... n-eos-77d/


No camera is obsolete , it's just a box with a hole that lets in light - if you really want a 77D , hold off buying for a few more months until you have the money to get what you really want .

Best of luck . :thup:
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by -DL- »

It's going to be quite some time before I'm financially straight enough to get what I would like - and I'm not talking months here, it will possibly be years.

I've already bought the 700D that the in-laws donated money for. 2200 shutter count, a listed condition of 9 out of 10. The seller has 100% feedback and 5 start for item description, so have no doubt to disbelieve how it's been described. Original box with the original strap, battery, charger etc. £189 including postage. Can't really go wrong with that. Slightly better than what I had too. Ironically enough, it was cheaper than buying a like for like replacement, and it's the last model I could have that I could use my existing battery grip with, as I didn't want to outlay for a new one of them and spare batteries either.

We're going away at the end of next month, touring The West Country and Wales, I need a camera for that.
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Clacton-ammer »

Samba wrote: Mon Sep 16, 2019 1:07 am Actually, one of the phone-in threads on Radio London Sunday night was about when a parent or parents die & the job of then sorting/chucking out their stuff.
Many people phoning/emailing/texting in, had found it almost impossible & heartbreaking to do. Some other people are able to do it with little, if any, sentiment.
Stuff that is so precious to us now, will be utterly meaningless to us after we're gone. It might then be precious to those we leave behind, for those that have someone to leave behind.
That funny little Christmas card that I made for my mum & dad, when I was a little kid, I was amazed to discover (before he died), that my dad had kept it. Now & again I look at it & quietly weep that it had meant so much to him, that he kept it. Maybe I should have put it in his coffin with him; maybe I should ask someone to put it in mine one day. If I don't, it'll probably just get thrown away. In a way, what will it matter then?
What's the best thing to leave people with? Perhaps it's just nice memories.
Samba, lovely post dude :thup:

It's a funny old world, your story really touched me, my dad has Alzheimer's/vascular dementia so has left us but is still alive, in a home now so I helped his partner sort his stuff out from his gaff. My dad never really showed much emotion to me, old school, but I found old pictures of me, some awards I had won as a kid etc that he had kept. Mixed emotions about finding them, love, anger, pride, anger again, love etc. I have never been one for materialistic sentimental things as I have always expressed it more in actions/words but finding those pieces I wish I had kept more bits.

I do visit the thread regularly just to see how you are all doing, rarely post now as the people on here offering help/advice/an ear are far better than I could ever be, keep fighting the good fight peeps :thup:
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by The Old Man of Storr »

-DL- wrote: Tue Sep 17, 2019 4:59 pm It's going to be quite some time before I'm financially straight enough to get what I would like - and I'm not talking months here, it will possibly be years.

I've already bought the 700D that the in-laws donated money for. 2200 shutter count, a listed condition of 9 out of 10. The seller has 100% feedback and 5 start for item description, so have no doubt to disbelieve how it's been described. Original box with the original strap, battery, charger etc. £189 including postage. Can't really go wrong with that. Slightly better than what I had too. Ironically enough, it was cheaper than buying a like for like replacement, and it's the last model I could have that I could use my existing battery grip with, as I didn't want to outlay for a new one of them and spare batteries either.

We're going away at the end of next month, touring The West Country and Wales, I need a camera for that.
2200 clicks , that's brilliant !
Why some people buy cameras I wouldn't know - I was seeing second hand Nikon D850s costing over £3k new for sale with less than a thousand shutter clicks after just a matter of days of them being released .

Have fun on your trip . :thup:
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by bristolhammerfc »

Haven't posted on here for a while, but thought I would in case it helps someone else.

I am not going to go over the issues that meant my financial situation was dire and how that effected me, but here is a solution I found that really helped.

Firstly, without everyone on here and some individuals in particular, lifting me off the deck, it might have been a different story.

So, after months of scraping and scrimping, we bit the bullet and contacted Stepchange.org.

They were brilliant. They talked to me over the phone about various options and weren't judgemental or patronising. We opted to go for a debt management plan.

They did a financial review, gave us template letters to send to our creditors and advised us on going forward.

All of our creditors have accepted payment plans and we will be debt free in a year and 7 months.

Please, please if you find yourself in a similar situation, swallow the pride and give them a call. It's worth it. We have been able to sleep better and although the initial calls and messages from creditors was wearing, it died off really quickly.

Mentally it has improved us no end
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by S-H »

That really is great to hear, briz. :thup:
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by The Old Man of Storr »

It's difficult talking about and admitting we're in trouble but you did it , Bristol , not only that you dug in and found a solution to your problems , and now you're sharing it on here so as to help others - you're an exceptional human being , mate . :thup:
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by North Devon Hammer »

Without going into too much detail I can back up everything Bristol says about Stepchange.
One of my adult children has serious mental health problems which include an addition to gambling that has contributed to huge debt problems.
As a Dad I thought that I could deal with any problem that arise but I had no idea what an addiction meant.
Trying to clear my child's debts led to to my own debt problems.
Stepchange have been superb. If you ever find yourself struggling with debt problems please don't hesitate to contact them.
It will take me years to pay my debts but the stress has been massively reduced and they are always on the end of a phone call.
Onwards and upwards
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Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Samba »

bristolhammerfc wrote: Sat Sep 21, 2019 9:02 am All of our creditors have accepted payment plans and we will be debt free in a year and 7 months.
That is so great to hear, bristol. Well done to you & yours for getting organised.
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