Anything goes in The Snug, General Discussion's rebellious little brother. An off-topic den of iniquity where any subject not covered elsewhere may be discussed. Well, anything except golf, Star Wars and Arsenal.
Harlow and others ... firstly, I’ve got huge admiration for you all in putting your issues down in print. That takes a lot of courage and sometimes helps to make them clearer.
Secondly, I sometimes feel a bit low, particularly at this time of year as a result of a bit of cabin fever, and the 3 month long chore that is Christmas (for the first time this year, I had to leave an Xmas shopping trip as I was so upset by the materialism of it all, whilst homeless were sat on the street). When I feel like this, I find a walk in a park quite restorative and helps a lot - it doesn’t need to be long but being in the fresh air, and looking at simple things in nature such as a squirrel running up a tree, the kites flying above, or just a leave being blown around the place ... these things really lift my spirits. People in parks generally are a bit more relaxed too and a smile or brief acknowledgement is most beneficial. This isn’t going to solve everything but may be a little positive thing that might help.
Merry Christmas one and all, hope everyone has a relaxing and peaceful day.
Quick reminder for those that may want to take part today. Sarah Millicans #joinin campaign is on its 9th year.
Go to Twitter and click on #joinin if you fancy having a chat today.
Thanks for all those that have added to the thread.
You have no idea how much they have helped over the few days. Virtual strangers willing to help or even listen makes a massive difference.
Getting stuff down in writing, as hard as it was at the time, has helped immensely. A small glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel.
Took the dog for a long walk to see my dad this morning, contacted a few friends I’ve not spoken too for a while and arranged a few catch ups in the new year. Now trying to understand the rules of dungeons and dragons with my boys!
Truly grateful for the KUMB “family”, a long way to go but I needed to start somewhere.
Merry Christmas to all, have a great day now watch those b******** ruining it on Boxing Day
Think the first two weeks of the New Year will see divorce proceedings start
Exactly the same day as my last marriage blew up.
I give up. Just tired of fighting for this now, she flips flops so much, just banging my head against a brick wall trying to save it. I don't even know if she will be all sweetness and light tomorrow but even if she is , it won't last.
If we didn't have children, I would have given her a couple of chances and then jettisoned her but she knows I won't walk away, so doing this is easy for her.
I have not had a drink in nearly 20 years now and I'm seriously considering going down to the pub tonight it's that bad. Looking forward to New Year obviously
ageing hammer wrote: ↑Fri Dec 27, 2019 7:58 pm
Sorry to hear this Whitey, I would give the pub a skip mate it is not the answer and won't help you one bit.
I am sure some of the others on here will offer you some advice soon, and all I can say is that I hope you can get through this.
Cheers mate. I'm sure I won't head down there., just feel like it but you're right, it will make things much worse.
Will probably go out for a walk instead to clear my head.
Christmas can be very much like going on Holiday , we look forward to the event so much but it's fraught with various problems and stress and these manifest themselves in couples falling out - if the falling out only occur at Christmas I wouldn't worry about the situation , if it's a year round thing then that's a whole different ball game .
You said your previous relationship broke down at Christmas , is this purely coincidence or do you find this time of year particularly stressful ?
Hope you can work things out , Mr White .
Sorry to hear that ,Whitey.Christmas always seems to make me focus too,I suppose it's the break in routine.
Hope you can figure a way through all of it.
Seriously, the most calls to & appointments with solicitors, regarding seeking a divorce, hit a peak just after Christmas & the New Year, EVERY single year.
It's a f*cking fraught time that clearly makes existing problems, come to a head.
If a couple can get through Christmas, they're doing well..
Nice one, mushy.
Don't forget people, Christmas & the difficulties that it can bring might be over, but tonight & tomorrow can be equally difficult, especially if one is feeling a bit down, anyway.
Never forget, you're never alone on here & also that there's ALWAYS hope.
I hope that everyone on here has the best 2020, that they possibly can.
I've been mashed up in the system.Been switched from one Mental Health Trust to another( no one's fault, just fallen foul of bureaucracy). I had a good thing with my old shrink and his crew, but now I'm not allowed to see him anymore and I'm with a new outfit.Tomorrow morning I'm being visited by a MHnurse(+a student) who are going to 'assess my mental health needs'. [They could,however, just look at nearly 50 years of medical records. ]
Actually I know I need some help, but I've had plenty of assessments and it's difficult to know how to behave.Even though they are trained etc,etc, some of them can't see through an appearance of rationality, on the other hand I'm so worked up about it, I'll probably say nothing at all,I don't want to be sectioned.
Fingers crossed.
Tenbury wrote: ↑Wed Jan 01, 2020 1:15 pm
I'll probably say nothing at all,I don't want to be sectioned.
Definitely don't mention your plans for Gold & Sullivan..
It is always difficult to know how to present oneself, especially with a new person (or people). You can't always believe that you will be understood.
I don't doubt in all your years of experience Tenners, that you've seen some good people but equally at times, some f*cking idiots.
I hope tomorrow that it's the former.
As you feel that you need some help, try to think about what help you would like, if possible.
Best of luck, mate.
I'm really not great myself. Mum came out of hospital yesterday after 19 days & can't really do much for herself.
We've had a carer come in twice. She's African & very nice & caring but can hardly speak English, which is not the best situation.
I'm really struggling to cope but I realise that it couldn't be a worse time of year to get anything up & running. I'm just hoping for some more help soon. It really didn't seem the best idea to discharge her on New Years Eve..
Samba wrote: ↑Wed Jan 01, 2020 10:16 pm
I'm really not great myself. Mum came out of hospital yesterday after 19 days & can't really do much for herself.
We've had a carer come in twice. She's African & very nice & caring but can hardly speak English, which is not the best situation.
I'm really struggling to cope but I realise that it couldn't be a worse time of year to get anything up & running. I'm just hoping for some more help soon. It really didn't seem the best idea to discharge her on New Years Eve..
When I sent you the PM last night I hadn't seen this - sorry .