The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Anything goes in The Snug, General Discussion's rebellious little brother. An off-topic den of iniquity where any subject not covered elsewhere may be discussed. Well, anything except golf, Star Wars and Arsenal.

Moderators: Gnome, last.caress, Wilko1304, Rio, bristolhammerfc, the pink palermo, chalks

Post Reply
User avatar
S-H
Posts: 49112
Joined: Tue Jul 06, 2010 7:05 am
Location: Kumb Inn
Has liked: 5737 likes
Total likes: 9649 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by S-H »

Tenners I love you, mate.
User avatar
-DL-
Bag Man
Posts: 30097
Joined: Fri Dec 05, 2008 7:43 am
Has liked: 837 likes
Total likes: 4952 likes
Contact:

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by -DL- »

Not often I'm lost for words Tenners, but on this occasion I am.
User avatar
The Old Man of Storr
Posts: 32777
Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2009 11:17 am
Location: Lost In the Recesses Of My Mind .
Has liked: 2640 likes
Total likes: 1746 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by The Old Man of Storr »

Cannot add anything meaningful other than you are one of the most loved posters on here , Jerry so that has to count for something -

Our lives are fleeting , some get more time than others , quality of life will also play its part but days pass one after the other , when given these diagnoses we long for another sunrise or sunset , we long for as many as we can get but in the end it catches up with us all - we talk about our lives on a daily basis but death is almost always avoided yet life and death go hand in hand , there is no one without the other .

All we can hope for is a pain free and happy life - some are afforded this while others aren't as fortunate , we get the cards we're dealt and we play them as best we can .


Well , just came off the phone with Dr Z -

I learned that the Radiotherapy will begin in 3 months time not the 6 I was told initially and that the hormonal therapy may or may not carry on for 18 months afterwards , depends on toleration and PSA levels .

Feeling a bit jiggled now so will go outside to enjoy some sunshine xx .

p.s. Cheers , Nick . :newthumb:
User avatar
Mega Ron
Posts: 12447
Joined: Thu Nov 30, 2006 2:35 pm
Location: -.-- --- ..- / -.-. ..- -. - ...
Has liked: 170 likes
Total likes: 175 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Mega Ron »

Tenbury wrote: Fri Jun 02, 2023 2:27 pm I'm terminal.
Bloody fortunate it's my heart, as any pain is likely to be shortlived. Downside, it' ll happen(probably) very quickly, so the time to make your peace/tell to f**k off, is now... but then perhaps it is anyway.
I take much comfort from what DL has said.
I think, above all, I'm becoming very conscious of the immediacy of everything. Nothing else really matters.
Much love mate.
User avatar
Tenbury
Posts: 9264
Joined: Wed Apr 13, 2016 3:28 pm
Location: Too near Kidderminster
Has liked: 721 likes
Total likes: 1207 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Tenbury »

I'm blown away. Utterly speechless. Gobsmacked by simple human kindness. Thank you.Thankyou, Nick.
You never stop learning.
I ain't going anywhere yet. 👍
User avatar
The Old Man of Storr
Posts: 32777
Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2009 11:17 am
Location: Lost In the Recesses Of My Mind .
Has liked: 2640 likes
Total likes: 1746 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by The Old Man of Storr »

Tenbury wrote: Fri Jun 02, 2023 4:42 pm
I ain't going anywhere yet. 👍

Good . :newthumb:
User avatar
Samba
Posts: 21811
Joined: Mon Apr 03, 2017 3:36 pm
Location: David Sullivan's least favourite fluffer.
Has liked: 2484 likes
Total likes: 895 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Samba »

Mum's birthday today, 3rd of June. First one since she died last July. Another 'first' in the 'year of firsts'.
I keep on remembering this time last year when she enjoyed the birthday lunch that we took in for her. Had no idea at the time that it would be her last. She reached a good age, so I'm always grateful for that but it's still very painful. As it is for so many, many people.
Been a hard year, mentally for me. And then recently diagnosed with diabetes.. the sugar-free icing on the f*cking cake..
Oh well, these things happen. Life can't be perfect & isn't really, for anyone ultimately. I don't believe anyone ever said it would be, but you know, you always hope..
Be grateful for any luck & happy memories you may have been lucky to have had & cherish those things when they happen now, even if they're just simple pleasures. And f*ck everything else.
User avatar
Tenbury
Posts: 9264
Joined: Wed Apr 13, 2016 3:28 pm
Location: Too near Kidderminster
Has liked: 721 likes
Total likes: 1207 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Tenbury »

***** year for you, mate, but hey, you've got through it. In time, your memories will make you smile.
User avatar
OFT
Posts: 21533
Joined: Mon Apr 04, 2005 11:59 pm
Location: Sleepin’ in a bayou on a old rotten cot
Has liked: 2992 likes
Total likes: 1757 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by OFT »

A lot has been written on here in the last couple of days or so.
Full of admiration for all of you.
:blowkiss:
Paolopaul
Posts: 2151
Joined: Wed Sep 14, 2016 8:44 pm
Has liked: 10 likes
Total likes: 301 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Paolopaul »

Morning all,

Very humbling to read some of the stories on here, a lot of bravery in tough situations and a lot to admire.

I had a session with my therapist this week and the treatment plan is clear - don’t try to stop the knee pain, try to make life as enjoyable as possible whilst the pain is there. Connect with people, find time for hobbies and get lots of rest. Plus a smattering of diazepam to help along the way. My condition is so linked to anxiety and depression that it’s treating that which is the priority.

Thought I was doing well with this after a great weekend last week, but a few days of work and broken sleep have really set me back. So frustrating and I’ve ended up in a panic last night and this morning. My Dad called me a few days ago and has prostate cancer, which has been picked up early but still a concern. He’ll hear more about what happens next in a few weeks.

Hope you all have a good mental health day and find those little pockets of joy. I’m going to try to get out and enjoy the sunshine…
User avatar
The Old Man of Storr
Posts: 32777
Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2009 11:17 am
Location: Lost In the Recesses Of My Mind .
Has liked: 2640 likes
Total likes: 1746 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by The Old Man of Storr »

-DL- wrote: Fri Jun 02, 2023 10:57 am

You do eventually get used to the changes, the memories of going to and from chemo or radio, the feeling of it totally dominating your life - but the truth is - cancer does dominate your life, and your nearest and dearest lives.

It's ****, and I ain't going to sit here and dress it up - but nor am I trying to put the fear of God in to you. I'm trying to prepare you that from point of diagnosis, point of referral even, life will never be the same again - but time and adjustments will allow you to find a new normal, and that time will eventually come and you'll feel at peace and at ease again - but it will always be there in the back of your mind, and if you get your head around that, you're more than half way to winning.
Your input as always is invaluable . :newthumb:

Well , you're correct in that it does dominate your lives -

Jennie had just returned from the Sculpture Class she'd joined along with Mrs Collector and she was enjoying her class , meeting up with another half a dozen ladies once a week , challenging herself with an NC course - she was so happy that Monday I'd received the news I couldn't tell her until the following day - all I could remember was this Nurse saying ' I'm so sorry , I'm so sorry ' - she'd also mentioned ' Maggie's ' which is a hub for cancer patients to use next to the hospital , chat to those folk who can answer your questions and offer support - I thought Maggie's was for those diagnosed with terminal cancer so you can imagine how I felt that night - as we were all having dinner and watching TV I kept popping in and out of the house to look at the stars doing some stupid breathing exercise wondering what I was going to say to them the following day .

Immediately after I told her Jen left her Sculpture Class with 2 months still to run . Coincidentally it would be 2 months between getting the original diagnosis and discovering that it had not spread and what the treatment would entail and two weeks ago I went along with Jen and The Collector for the opening night of the exhibition which Jen's work would have been part of had she stayed - that saddened me truth be told - had we known back then what we know now she may have carried on - hey ho .

On May 12th I was told I'd be on hormonal treatment for 6 months then I'd go on to Radiotherapy - yesterday the Doctor who phoned me told me [ because of the positioning of my cancer ] he wants to start Radiotherapy in 3 months time - I didn't know whether to be worried or relieved . Me being me chose ' Worried ' . Jen , ever the pragmatist went with ' At least you're getting treatment ' .

I could go into a Patient Block for a month and come home at weekends but Jen wants to be with me so we're trying to find the cheapest accommodation available around the Inverness area , Nairn , Morayshire and try to treat it like a holiday - as long as there's a toilet handy I'll be ok . Apparently I can expect a pain in the arse for 6-8 weeks afterwards [ insert joke as appropriate :grin: ] .
User avatar
ageing hammer
Posts: 25445
Joined: Thu Jan 03, 2008 9:04 am
Location: Cockney Hammer's stunt double
Has liked: 484 likes
Total likes: 1475 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by ageing hammer »

Tenbury wrote: Fri Jun 02, 2023 2:27 pm I'm terminal.
Bloody fortunate it's my heart, as any pain is likely to be shortlived. Downside, it' ll happen(probably) very quickly, so the time to make your peace/tell to f**k off, is now... but then perhaps it is anyway.
I take much comfort from what DL has said.
I think, above all, I'm becoming very conscious of the immediacy of everything. Nothing else really matters.
Love you Tenners :heart: :muscle:
rigoberts song
Posts: 4428
Joined: Mon Aug 24, 2009 2:17 pm
Location: Sleepy cotswold village
Has liked: 77 likes
Total likes: 331 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by rigoberts song »

Don't go popping off Tenners we need you in the gardening thread how else do we get advice?
Seriously sending love from the bottom of my heart you're a great human being .Be strong my friend
User avatar
Samba
Posts: 21811
Joined: Mon Apr 03, 2017 3:36 pm
Location: David Sullivan's least favourite fluffer.
Has liked: 2484 likes
Total likes: 895 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Samba »

The Old Man of Storr wrote: Sat Jun 03, 2023 9:25 am I could go into a Patient Block for a month and come home at weekends but Jen wants to be with me so we're trying to find the cheapest accommodation available around the Inverness area , Nairn , Morayshire and try to treat it like a holiday - as long as there's a toilet handy I'll be ok . Apparently I can expect a pain in the arse for 6-8 weeks afterwards [ insert joke as appropriate :grin: ] .
Not more fingers?..

Would Elgin where you stayed before (& know well) be an option?
How would it affect your holiday let, if you're both not there?
User avatar
WHU Independent
Posts: 6657
Joined: Wed Dec 12, 2007 10:35 pm
Has liked: 1637 likes
Total likes: 506 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by WHU Independent »

ageing hammer wrote: Sat Jun 03, 2023 7:59 pm Love you Tenners :heart: :muscle:


What AH said. Wishing all the best mate.
User avatar
Tenbury
Posts: 9264
Joined: Wed Apr 13, 2016 3:28 pm
Location: Too near Kidderminster
Has liked: 721 likes
Total likes: 1207 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by Tenbury »

You're all very kind.
I'm in no pain, and I'm not stressed (just the reverse). As such I'm far better off than many on here, so enough about me, move on.

[ Peter, FFS get that treatment started,hanging around in limbo is sh*t, sooner you do, the sooner you'll feel better. :wolfy:]
User avatar
The Old Man of Storr
Posts: 32777
Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2009 11:17 am
Location: Lost In the Recesses Of My Mind .
Has liked: 2640 likes
Total likes: 1746 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by The Old Man of Storr »

Samba wrote: Sun Jun 04, 2023 12:39 am

Would Elgin where you stayed before (& know well) be an option?
How would it affect your holiday let, if you're both not there?

I was initially told it would be November or December so Jen looked at the Parkdean site [ caravan ] in Nairn but they close for Winter , she found one in Lossiemouth [ Covesea ] for November but they were closed in December .

September won't be a problem for accommodation [ for us ] but yeah it didn't occur to me until this morning that we're normally full in September and parts of October here on Skye - at the moment people have only booked the first week of September but the pattern of booking can vary - we've had folk book for 2024 [ at this year's prices ] , then people will book days before they arrive . When we lived in Elgin [ September - May 2018/19 then September - August 2019/20 because of Covid ] Jen would drive from Elgin to Skye to perform a change-over on her own after Covid restrictions lessened - we could just block off the dates and say ' Sod it ' or she may drive back to Skye for a change-over , we hadn't thought about it till now :grin: - I'm only getting treatment 5 days a week for 4 weeks so I could come home at weekends - I believe the problems with the bladder and the bowels only begin to take effect towards the end of the treatment so I should be ok travelling . To be perfectly honest with you , mate we haven't given it much thought at all , none until 5 minutes ago after I read your post !! November and December would have been more convenient - I don't know why they decided on September rather than November - the Doctor did mention the positioning of the cancer but it wasn't a great line and he was ' foreign ' - I did ask him to repeat himself a couple of times but I didn't want to come across as rude either so I was only taking in bits and pieces - I'm guessing he decided to bring it forward because the cancer is positioned near the shell of the prostate and there's a chance it could push through . I did find it strange because my next hormonal injection is due on the 1st September and I thought the Radiotherapy had to wait until after that had done its work but I guess they can give me both treatments at the same time .

When I was getting my first injection on Friday my old mate , Trev [ Antiques Dealer ] was in to have his prostate felt by the same Doctor who referred me so I was able to thank him for his prompt action when he came out to call Trev [ two weeks ago I was talking to Trev near the Broadford Co-op where his business premises are , he told me his Dad had died of prostate cancer in 2007 ] - he's Romanian [ the Dr ] by descent and lives in Hastings , speaks with a right posh English accent - he comes up to Skye one week in 4 - lovely man - I asked him how come he spoke with ' that ' accent - he just said it was a mixture of his natural Romanian and wherever he learned English . I must have kept him talking for at least 20 minutes on etymology and linguistics - anything to distract myself from reality . :grin:
User avatar
ageing hammer
Posts: 25445
Joined: Thu Jan 03, 2008 9:04 am
Location: Cockney Hammer's stunt double
Has liked: 484 likes
Total likes: 1475 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by ageing hammer »

Tomos over here in Cork we have a castle called Blarney castle. There is a stone at the top that if you kiss it it gives you the gift of the gab.

I reckon you have been over here sometime and ****ing swallowed it. :grin:
User avatar
kenthammer
Posts: 5465
Joined: Sun Aug 17, 2003 6:02 pm
Location: 1980 Cup Final veteran
Has liked: 245 likes
Total likes: 395 likes

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by kenthammer »

ageing hammer wrote: Sun Jun 04, 2023 11:14 am Tomos over here in Cork we have a castle called Blarney castle. There is a stone at the top that if you kiss it it gives you the gift of the gab.

I reckon you have been over here sometime and ****ing swallowed it. :grin:
Think there's a few on here have probably sat on it :grin:
User avatar
btajim - mcfc
There when they were sh*t
Posts: 9878
Joined: Fri Mar 02, 2007 11:40 am
Location: Cheshire
Has liked: 72 likes
Total likes: 440 likes
Contact:

Re: The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

Post by btajim - mcfc »

I start my new job tomorrow. I had two offers and there’s also one outstanding. I think I had about seven interviews in total so I’m pleased something good came of them.

Whilst the one I chose is temp to perm, I got a better experience from them over the permanent position. Promised documents were not received and neither were replacements. I was also kept waiting for 45 minutes when I went in with my passport. Nobody seemed remotely bothered to help. I’ve sent in quite a strongly worded e-mail to their HR team as they must surely want to know.

You spend so much time at work that you have to be happy there.
Post Reply