The Mental Health Thread - (Help Contacts in First Post).

[wolf359]

And there we go!

Exercise was thoroughly recommended to me but we went in to a first lockdown not long after so it wasn’t as easy. I was no caffeine, no alcohol etc. It shocked me in to making changes.

Same (not caffeine) though, as I've posted before since the new year I am a different person physically and mentally. So much so I will be off the meds in two weeks, been scaling them down the last 10 weeks or so (doctors blessing.) No boose, a job that makes me feel worth while and exercise have been a major difference - it is not rocket science, live better- feel better but it is far harder to achieve.

[ageing hammer]

Wolf and Ron great to read something positive from you both.

It proves it is not hopeless and it can and will get better if we keep on trying.

Well done to you both.

[btajim - mcfc]

I tried a first cup of tea after a few weeks of the depression diagnosis and had to pour half of it away because my head started spinning.

Thankfully lockdown stopped any need to travel, go out etc. I’m a good sleeper so I averaged 14 hours a day over two spells as my medication made me tired.

I believe mine was brought on by constant move, a job I hated with a manager determined to destroy me, family stress and a civil legal situation where I’d done nothing wrong. That’s all over now and I could never live in a big city again.

[mushy]

How are you doing today Ron?
Same goes for you wolf.
Hope you are both feeling a little better.

[wolf359]

How are you doing today Ron?
Same goes for you wolf.
Hope you are both feeling a little better.

I’m great thanks. Have been so for several months now, alls good in my little world.

[rigoberts song]

You're a wonderful caring person Mushy for looking out for us like you do .Thank you

[btajim - mcfc]

Women. I swear I’ll never understand them. Two attempts in the last twelve months and neither have lasted more than a month.

The first was a lively so and so. We were hanging out lots and, by pure chance, she had to spend the night at mine when she locked herself out of her flat. I was walking past on my way home and she was stood there on the verge of tears! It went on from there and we got together. A month later she turned on me and it was over.

The second was more on my level mindset. Open minded and affable, I asked her out on a whim and she agreed. Now, after a month of doing things together, she’s messaged me saying she doesn’t want a relationship.

I do everything I can to put them first. Spoil them too. Pretty much everyone I know is settled in a relationship and I just can’t seem to meet anyone who just wants the same thing. I’m not the jealous type. I give them their independence.

Positive thoughts?

[S-H]

I assume you are ready to settle down Jim.

Credit to the two women for not stringing you along, probably would have been more painful for you in the long run, had either relationship gone on for longer.

Try not to dwell on it, I'm sure you'll find someone better suited to you, if that's what you really want.

Have you tried dating sites, etc?

[-DL-]

Jim,

Have you not ever stopped to think that this spoiling thing may well be coming over to them as being a bit heavy? Maybe you're giving the impression of moving to fast? Women are a different breed to what they used to be, they don't want to be spoilt and smothered, especially when it's only a month in.

Honestly, I mean this as a genuine bit of advise for 21st century dating - maybe back off a bit - let it run it's course without the spoiling and putting them first. We can sometimes set ourselves up for a fall when we pay too much attention, try too hard. Build up to the spoiling and the chivalry once you know it's going somewhere proper. I don't mean treat them mean to keep them keen - just hit the brakes a bit at the start and don't let it run away with you until they feel pressurised and back out.

[btajim - mcfc]

That’s a very fair reply.

In London, the Swede insisted on living alone when she couldn’t afford to. Staying at hers all the time was boring so we’d go out and I’d often have to pay. Female friends were critical but she was a devious bugger who’d play games. Above anything, she was beautiful and an incredible lover so I kept going until I couldn’t cope with her anymore.

I know girls who remain with men who’ve cheated on them or stand up the pub two nights a week whilst they sit at home. I’d never treat a lady like that.

[Crouchend_Hammer]

Managed to drop my daily 150mg of Sertraline down to 100mg over the last week with no noticeable issues
Hopefully another couple of weeks at that level and can go down to 50mg

[btajim - mcfc]

Managed to drop my daily 150mg of Sertraline down to 100mg over the last week with no noticeable issues
Hopefully another couple of weeks at that level and can go down to 50mg

Are you getting medical advice? I was told my Citalopram was six months minimum back in March 2020. I’ve been using them ever since.

Whilst I don’t consider them addictive, I forgot to take them with me on two nights away and was anxious on the way home. The packed train didn’t help.

[wolf359]

Whilst I don’t consider them addictive, I forgot to take them with me on two nights away and was anxious on the way home. The packed train didn’t help.

I’ve gone from 20mg citlopram (been on since November) to 10mg, now 10mg every other day over the period of 16 weeks under docs guidance. On week 15 now and will finish before the end of the month. I must admit my sleep has been disturbed though having an 8 week old kitten the last two weeks hasn’t helped, but my ‘good’ mood and positive mindset have remained. Hopefully I’ll never need to return to them.

[btajim - mcfc]

The second girl has elaborated. Her mum is unwell and she’s over in North Wales for the foreseeable. She doesn’t want to mess me around. If we were together together then we could’ve worked round it but I understand.

I had an inkling something was personally wrong.

[fjthegrey]

Does anyone else feel alone? Not lonely or even unhappy but simply alone?

I increasingly feel like there's just me. I have a fantastic relationship with my wife, a beautiful baby son, family all around me, many friends, but I just feel increasingly like there's only me. A sort of solipsistic existence. Increasingly isolated mentally without really exhibiting any obvious change in behaviour.

I can possibly put it down to my job, where I spend most of my time on my own, listening to podcasts etc. That must be doing something to my brain, creating the illusion of socialising without actually doing any.

Not sure it's healthy to feel this way anyway, like the next stage is actual loneliness.

[Crouchend_Hammer]

Are you getting medical advice? I was told my Citalopram was six months minimum back in March 2020. I’ve been using them ever since.

Whilst I don’t consider them addictive, I forgot to take them with me on two nights away and was anxious on the way home. The packed train didn’t help.

Yes, based on medical advice

Was on 150mg for about 8 months

[Cockneyboy311]

Does anyone else feel alone? Not lonely or even unhappy but simply alone?

I increasingly feel like there's just me. I have a fantastic relationship with my wife, a beautiful baby son, family all around me, many friends, but I just feel increasingly like there's only me. A sort of solipsistic existence. Increasingly isolated mentally without really exhibiting any obvious change in behaviour.

I can possibly put it down to my job, where I spend most of my time on my own, listening to podcasts etc. That must be doing something to my brain, creating the illusion of socialising without actually doing any.

Not sure it's healthy to feel this way anyway, like the next stage is actual loneliness.

I think I know what you mean. I was out with work colleagues the other day, and kind of felt like I could have got up and left and nobody would have noticed for hours. I actually feel like that a lot of the time in social situations.

Over the years I've had 'bestie's' but they have either become mentally unwell (seriously, two of them) or moved away. Only the one who moved away came to my wedding for example. You pretend to take it on the chin, but it's more upsetting than you realise even though it's not really their fault.

I do think I'm a bit of a lone wolf, and maybe I give off those vibes without knowing it. I dunno.

[mushy]

I do think I'm a bit of a lone wolf, and maybe I give off those vibes without knowing it. I dunno.

Nothing wrong with that Cockneyboy, I suspect a lot of us have a lot of that in us. Social norms tend to dictate who we should be and what we should be like, I think most social norms are complete fabricated bollox.
It's acceptance of who we are and how we choose to deal with it that's important.
If it's at all possible, try not to worry about it.
Easier said then done of course.

[S-H]

I'm much the same, fj, I have a handful of brilliant friends, a loving wife and family.

I do feel alone at times, but I don't mind it you know, or I am at peace with it anyway.

It's hard to explain.

[fjthegrey]

I think I know what you mean. I was out with work colleagues the other day, and kind of felt like I could have got up and left and nobody would have noticed for hours. I actually feel like that a lot of the time in social situations.

Over the years I've had 'bestie's' but they have either become mentally unwell (seriously, two of them) or moved away. Only the one who moved away came to my wedding for example. You pretend to take it on the chin, but it's more upsetting than you realise even though it's not really their fault.

I do think I'm a bit of a lone wolf, and maybe I give off those vibes without knowing it. I dunno.

See, this isn't me at all. I'm not an introvert really. I can be quite loud, have no social anxiety whatsoever, happy to engage with anyone. It just all feels different to how it used to.

I really do just feel like I'm on my own. Maybe it's just a stage of life thing.